Educational....

OK so I got on WebMD and reacquainted myself with the terms the doctor used yesterday...I don't know why I feel compelled to type it out here...but I do so if I bore you don't read it lol!

PCOS...that is the condition that she said that it sounds like I've been experiencing...WebMD lists the symptoms...and I feel certain that that's exactly what has been going on with me...(of course, I also feel that I fit the symptons of various illnesses that it wouldn't be possible for me to have...I'm a hypochondriac that way lol...WebMD is my friend! lol)

so Metphormin or something like that is what she put me on...it's a type 2 diabietes medication that has also been shown to regulate a woman and cause pregnancy...lol...she said one of the side effect might be weight loss...I said...well that's always a bonus! lol

anyways...I go on Monday to an actual obgyn and she will just make sure I have all my parts and that nothing is blocked and so this morning I started freaking out...what if she wants me to do some sort of surgery...agh! I have NEVER had any sort of surgery or lengthy stay in the hospital and that is what is freaking me out at this point...maybe adoption is looking better to me...lol...but nah...this is so common...I just need to chill out...lol...

I'm very wide-eyed about the whole thing right now...it's a concept that is growing on me every day...I really think that it's weird how it's like...I never really thought of myself in this way even though I knew I eventually wanted children...I just...well this is a growing up thing I guess...I've always been a late bloomer/maturer...probably a lot of factors caused that...but I'm just having this moment right now of...oh yeah...let's do that...weird...I'm weird...lol...and I don't know how to describe it...I'm just an odd duck...and I'm ok with that...but I just have this sense that it is all in God's timing and everything is going to be ok...

husband and I are in a really good place right now...not so much financially...it's tax season and he did something silly that will probably make us have to pay this year (I will fill ya all in on that at a later time)...but as far as our marriage and the way we are veiwing us and our lives...our relationship has never been bad persay, but I don't know...it just seems that right now it just seems that we are in such a growth spurt in our relationship...does that make sense? It's never been as good as it is right now...I don't want to get all mushy...but we are just having a great marriage right now...communicating and all that crap...lol...I really think it has to do with us both praying and growing spiritually more than we ever have since we've been together...that's always a good thing right?!!!!

gosh this journaling thing is so theraputic...I think I'd do it even if nobody read it...lol...but it's nice to share stuff too...

thanks for the therapy girls!