It started out as just another day....

August 14, 2012 is not a day I would want to re-live any time soon. I should have lost my life that day
 and I’m very very lucky that I didn’t harm anyone else. So many things go through my mind when I think of that fateful day. So many what ifs, so many how could I’s, so many oh mys, so many thank you Gods!


I had just taken Cali to the doctor for her preschool physical and we were on our way to have her vision check up, which is also required for preschool enrollment. She was in a car seat behind me in my Ford Expedition, belted in and I was also wearing my seat belt. I had been getting over a cold/sinus yuck, so I hadn’t slept that well the night before. I had also taken some Mucinex DM, which says it’s non-drowsy but my mother swears it makes her drowsy. Whatever, I remember being sleepy. It was a warm afternoon, kind of cloudy day, after lunch, I was drowsy. I was driving on a fairly straight although hilly stretch of road and the next thing I remember is a sickening crunch/crash sound, I remember seeing dirt flying in front of me and being jostled around and just waiting for the car to stop moving so I could get to Cali. The car finally stopped (I found out later we had actually rolled several times) and I tried to open my door. It wouldn’t budge. I remember shoving against it and somehow getting out my door (later, Jimmie and my dad had to practically use a crow bar to get that door to open). I opened Cali’s door. She was crying. I got her out of her car seat and by that time, some other people had stopped. They took Cali from me and told me to lie down on the ground. They sat Cali beside me and I attempted to sit up to hug her and console her but everyone kept telling me to lie down and stop touching my head. I had lots and lots of blood coming from my head. I found out later I was nearly scalped.

It seemed to me all the first responders, police and paramedics showed up quickly and all at once. When asked what happened, I yelled that I think I fell asleep and I remember crying over and over at the thought of something so stupid and telling everyone how stupid I was… what a stupid thing to do. A lady asked if she could pray with me and I said yes absolutely please pray with me. I think the policeman asked for my license because I told somebody something was in my purse. A lady brought me my Bible, which is in a holder that looks like a purse. I told her, no that’s my Bible, as if she were silly for thinking it was my purse. I think they finally found my purse. I told them it was sitting in the seat next to me. Later I would learn how silly I was for thinking it should be in its proper place because apparently I rolled the vehicle several times. I did have the presence of mind to tell them my husband’s name and cell phone number.

Eventually they put a neck brace on me that was five sizes too small, which I would have the pleasure of wearing for hours… blah… and loaded me on a stretcher and into an ambulance. Cali had to go in a different ambulance to a different hospital, which in hind sight should have freaked me out a lot more than it did but I did have blood gushing out my head. I remember being scared that the paramedics would drop me when they picked me up to put me in the ambulance but they jokingly told me they never dropped anyone on Tuesdays. During the ambulance ride, I would randomly yell out how stupid I was and how stupid this situation was because I made a stupid mistake. The paramedic I rode in the ambulance with was a very nice man. He kept telling me I was lucky to be alive and that we all do stupid things. He would calm me down and then I would start ranting again. I think I asked him a few times if I was going to live.

We went to U of L Hospital emergency room because as they so delicately told me, I would have freaked out our smaller local hospital…. That’s always encouraging. So sitting in the check-in area of the ER at U of L hospital, I got my first glimpse of myself in one of those convex mirrors up in the corner. I couldn’t see myself very clearly, even though my contacts had somehow survived all the blood that had washed through my eyes (when we first stopped moving I wasn’t very sure I was not blind because there was so much blood in my eyes, I couldn’t see a thing). But what I saw made me cringe. The paramedic told me at that point that I’d probably have to have plastic surgery. I said are you serious? Trying not to freak out…

They got me in to a little room of sorts with sliding glass doors and there was lots of nurses hovering and hooking me up to ivs and tubes of all sorts…. Then a familiar voice… my co-worker Valerie came in… God love her heart. She had talked to Jimmie and knew Jimmie was going where Cali was so she came where I was until my family could get to me. Another familiar voice showed up… our preacher and friend Shawn… he prayed with me and kept Jimmie updated… and then my boss and her daughter…. At some point, Jimmie also called and talked to me and I told him I was scalped. The only news he had been able to get up to that point was that I had a severe head wound and had lost a lot of blood. My mom and sister showed up next, I think, and I couldn’t help but turn in to this babbling blob again telling them how stupid I was and just crying my eyes out to them. They had just come from where Cali was so they assured me she was ok. I kept wondering if Jimmie would hate me. My goodness, if something had happened to Cali, I do not know how I would have lived with myself let alone how I would have ever been able to expect someone else to forgive me. When Jimmie showed up, that’s the first thing I asked him… did he hate me… of course he didn’t hate me… at some point Jimmie went to see the wreck and try to get some of my things out of it. I particularly told him to get a check that had been sitting in the console. When he came back he told me he had found the check but the console was no longer there. He took lots of pictures and when I saw the pictures, the realization of what a miracle it was that not only was I alive but that somehow Cali was completely unscathed dawned on me. In my mind’s eye, I picture Angels wrapped around Cali and a few around me too… probably just letting me get hurt enough to give me a wake-up call.

Eventually, they removed the torturous neck brace and then two very nice, sweet, funny little doctor boys sewed my head up. They had to sew two layers of something. About 30 stitches on the top part anyway. A little while after that I was able to get up and walk to the bathroom (after having had the wonderfully unpleasant experience of using a bed pan several times.. .YUCK!). That’s when I really got to see the nightmare that was me. I looked like the Bride of Frankenstein a bit… my face and my hair were drenched in dried blood… my hair was just completely plastered and full of gunk… it took me about a week to get all that out of there.

Today I am healing fine and all that jazz… it’s amazing how the big gapping hole on my head has healed right up. I also suffered a dislocated toe, which they had to pop back in place; a broken pinky finger on my left hand, which had to have 2 pins put in, numerous cuts and bruises… I still have moments… like the other day I was doing something with Cali and she was afraid it was going to hurt and I looked at her and told her I promise to never do anything to hurt you. But after I said it, I had to choke back the tears because I’ve already broken that promise by putting her in harm’s way that day in a moment of lack of self control, or as I like to refer to it, stupidity. The what-ifs will drive one mad if you let them, but I try not to beat myself up too much, and completely and humbly thank my Lord and protector that no one else was hurt that day.

When something like this happens, it is very humbling. I mean, I made a mistake and an accident happened and accidents happen every day. It has really opened my eyes and made me so much more empathetic to others when I hear about car accidents. We all really take for granted what an important job we take in our hands when we jump in the car. But not only that, I really feel awful for worrying the ones that love me… for what I put Jimmie through that day. He thought he was losing his wife. For the first few hours the only answer he got about me was that I had a very serious head injury and had lost a lot of blood.



There are people from that day that I will never see again and have no idea how to thank. The lady that stopped and made me lie down and prayed with me… the paramedics…the doctors and nurses…. but there are friends and family in my life that were there for me that day that I can thank… my preacher Shawn and his wife Sarah… not only did Shawn come to the hospital but also they kept 2 of our children overnight. My co-worker Valerie… she came to the hospital first and stayed until my mom could get to me. She knew Jimmie had to go take care of Cali so she came and took care of me. She even tried to clean my face before my mother and father got there because I was such a nightmare to look at. My boss and her daughter came for moral support also… my sister helped Jimmie out with a car seat for Cali, not to mention she dropped everything and drove 2 hours to see for herself that I was going to make it. My mom and dad… if ever there was a time I needed my mommy, it was then for sure! She even came and stayed a few days here and there after to help shuffle kids around between doctors’ appointments. And my dad, I will never forget the levity in his face when he came back with Jimmie after going to see the wrecked car the next day. Dad just came back in from that field trip and hugged me tightly with tears in his eyes.

In the midst of my recovery, we also got the news that baby A was leaving us, so I used some of my recovery time to get her things packed. I’m still finding tons of things that should have gone with her but I also figure that half the fun of having a baby girl is all the new things they get to buy her and spoil her with. Actually, with so much else going on, it made saying goodbye a tiny bit less painful. We all dearly miss her though. The kids have done well with the transition though. So we are still going to pursue the foster family calling. It seems we are all well suited to the lifestyle.



For several days after the wreck, I was sort of like Mary during the time when Jesus was born. There was so much in my head and heart that I wanted to pray and say to God that I didn’t know where to begin so I sort of just pondered and kept it all from exploding. Obviously thank you for protecting me was tops on the list, but in such a near death experience, how is that even adequate to express what I was feeling. I was sort of overwhelmed by His Goodness, His mercy, His peace, my unworthiness, my humanness… still am really. God is good, He is in control, and obviously He has a plan for my life and isn’t done with me yet!